Every year my now ex and I would load up the RV and the kids and head to California to spend a week camping on the beach.  It was like clockwork, our routine, our tradition. The first summer after our divorce I felt an empty ache for that vacation tradition. The idea of taking my kids on vacation solo paralyzed me for some reason. Not to mention I couldn’t bear the idea of heading back to that beach where we had so many memories. I could only focus on thoughts of how I’d probably stick out like a sore thumb at that campground with all the “complete” families. I felt overwhelmed, sad and alone.

It wasn’t until Christmastime many months later that I realized I just needed to put on my big girl pants and plan a little vacation. I had traveled solo by myself without my kids so what was so different taking them with?? I decided to plan a trip to up to Northern Arizona. It’s a 2 hour drive and an area I’m familiar with. I found a cute little Air BnB, dug the sleds out of the storage shed and planned some fun activities.  I sat down with my kids and we outlined our meals and decided what type of cookies we’d bake.  The planning alone was so much fun!  The weekend went so well.  We got matching pajamas and snuggled by the fire watching movies. The second morning we woke up to SNOW!  We sledded hard all day and made holiday cookies that evening. My kids were laughing and even GETTING ALONG! They were already asking if we could come again next year.

It started to feel like our new vacation tradition. I often tell clients that divorce isn’t a new chapter, it’s a whole new book! One that you get to write the way you want.  Dig out that suitcase and go plan something FUN this summer!